Dear Geoffrey,
I attempted to call you but you did not answer the phone. Therefore I am left to draw one of three conclusions. 1) Your phone fell into radioactive goo transforming if into a robot and being tired of your ceaseless demands of calling if ran away. 2) Due to an icreased amount and volume of you giving shoutouts to people you know across large rooms you have shouted so loud you are temporarily deaf. 3) In an attempt to rescue princess peach from king kooppa you fell prey to an evil flying turtle-duck while dodging a walking mushroom.
I attempted to call you but you did not answer the phone. Therefore I am left to draw one of three conclusions. 1) Your phone fell into radioactive goo transforming if into a robot and being tired of your ceaseless demands of calling if ran away. 2) Due to an icreased amount and volume of you giving shoutouts to people you know across large rooms you have shouted so loud you are temporarily deaf. 3) In an attempt to rescue princess peach from king kooppa you fell prey to an evil flying turtle-duck while dodging a walking mushroom.