Ms. Dennis

This past week while spending time with my wife's family, my father-in-law and I spent quite a bit of time at Healthsouth of North Houston. Healthsouth is the current resident of my mother-in-law's mother, Wanda Dennis (Ashley's grandmother). Ms. Dennis suffers from Alzheimer's. Her neurological disease in addition to the surgery and stroke she's gone through over the past two months have left her body and mind under an incredible amount of stress. The result of the stress has lead to an increasing loss of her short term memory. While her doctors are hopeful that she may be able to regain some of the memories lost due to her stress level, she remains in the rehabilitation hospital for the time being. The purpose for my father-in-law and I's visits were to receive and apply mobility training in order for Ms. Dennis to leave the hospital for Thanksgiving day. After getting her to and in the car on Thanksgiving my father-in-law went back inside the facility to make sure we had everything we need for her day away. She and I sat in the car waiting.

November 27th 2008 1:55 pm - Thanksgiving Day
Ms. Dennis - Now what is your relation to me?
Me - I am Ashley's husband.
Ms. Dennis - That's right, I went to your wedding.
Me - Thats right.
Ms. Dennis - It was a beautiful wedding. Why am I here?
Me - You had a stroke Ms. Dennis. You are here to get better, but me and Julian are taking you out for the day. It's Thanksgiving.
Ms. Dennis - I had a stroke? Thats right. How long ago was that?
Me - It has been about a month now.
Ms. Dennis - It has? (pause) Where is my husband? (My heart sinks and I begin to feel a knot in the back of my throat.) He's dead, isn't he?



September 18th 2005 1:15 pm - The day after Ashley and I started dating. I am in Lubbock visiting my family for the day.

(My cell phone rings.)
Me - (seeing it is Ashley) Hello?
Ashley - (sounding sad) Hi.
Me - What's wrong?
Ashley - My parents just called. (pause) My Grandfather just died.
Me - Ashley I am so sorry. I will head back to Abilene now.
Ashley - No. Enjoy your time with your family, I will see you tonight.
(I hurry through lunch and leave early anyway.)



March 15th 2008 6:45 pm - Waiting to escort my mom down the isle at mine and Ashley's wedding.

(I turn to see Ms. Dennis sitting in the back of the church foyer with her son Mike. They are waiting for their turn to walk down the isle.)
Ms. Dennis - Joel, we sure are happy to have you as part of the family.
Me - Thank you. (I bend down to hug her).
Ms. Dennis - You are a lucky man. Ashley is a wonderful girl. You will make her happy.
Mike - It's time to go mom.
Ms. Dennis - Welcome to the family.



November 27th 2008 1:56 pm - Thanksgiving Day

Ms. Dennis - He's dead, isn't he?
Me - Yes ma'am
Ms. Dennis - How did he die?
Me - I am not sure.
Ms. Dennis - How long ago was it?
Me - (remembering the phone call) A little over three years.
Ms. Dennis - I miss him.
Me - From what I have been told he was a great man.
Ms. Dennis - Oh. He was. (pause) Now what is your relation to me?
Me - I am Ashley's husband.
Ms. Dennis - Oh that's right. I went to your wedding. It was beautiful.


Ms. Dennis was right, even if she didn't know the full meaning of her words to me on my wedding day. I am very lucky man. Ashley is a wonderful girl, but more than that she also has a wonderful family. A family I am proud to now be a part of. I spent a good portion of my day, on Thanksgiving, sitting and talking with Ms. Dennis, trying to help in what ever way I could. I don't know if she even knows that I helped. I guarantee she doesn't know how much she has helped and encouraged me. In my life I strive, and will continue to strive to be a good man, a man that my wife will be able to say was a great man. A man worthy of my bride and the wonderful family I am now a part of.

Coffee House Confessions: Thanksgiving Holiday

Today I celebrate my first Thanksgiving without my immediate family. Marrying into a wonderful family my wife and I chose to spend our first Thanksgiving together at her parents home. Tuesday afternoon we loaded up the car and made the three and half hour drive from Tyler to Magnolia. Our first night in town we began looking for a valid form of entertainment for the entire family. Our journey led us to Wal-Mart in search of a fun board game for the whole family. We quickly picked up the game Yahtzee and on our way home stopped by Starbucks.

Before I met the Hawthorne family the only other time I had ever played Yahtzee was years before with my Grandmother and sisters in Mobile AL. The game consists of each player taking turns rolling five dice in search of different number combination. As we sat around the table playing the classic dice game and sipping our lattes I was reminded more and more of home. Some of the greatest times I have had with my family, new and old, have been while sitting at the kitchen table playing a game. Close to midnight with our Starbucks cups empty and in the trash and our Yahtzee cards half full, I was in the lead but to tired to play any more. We went to bed sore from laughter and ready to enjoy our more of our holiday together the next day.

Drink of Choice: Cinnamon Dolce Latte