Manwich Has Made My Life Better

It is true, Manwich has made my life better. Not because I have recently sampled the messy meaty meal but because of their new commercial and a random chain of events that I will enclose in this blog. While sitting and watching TV with my Frat brothers Nick Williamson and Ryan Eberst at their house on Friday night a commercial came on advertising Manwich. It was a commercial that I had not previously seen. It was a short add picturing a happy family eating Manwich Sloppy Joes. While the commercial played a jingel was sung in the background,

You don't have to be a man to love Manwich, you you don't have to be a witch either, its true. You just have to love a fun, tasty dinner, and wearing some of that dinner on you.

After seeing the commercial there was no reaction in the room. It wasn't until halfway through the next commercial that the laughter broke out. We agreeably decided that it was the stupidest commercial we had ever seen. The funniest thing about the commercial was that someone was actually paid money to write the jingle. In hopes that we would see the commercial again we quickly began searching the internet as to see it again and laugh once more. The commercial has not yet dawned the infinite portal of internet videos that is youtube but in our search for a laugh the manwich humor gods released to us another meaty morsel of goodness.


Gasping for air we simultaneously attempted to quote and reload the commercial as to see the shroude of manwich once again. It is still debatable if the commercial was real or ever aired on television but it was certain that manwich had brought us yet another side splitting moment.

Wanting not to give up on seeing the first commercial again we went back to our computers in search. Still not finding it we stumbled into a commentary on the song and the greatest blog that I have read to date. The blog is called Dispatches from Fort Awesome. It is written by a New York law student named Julia. Her post over the manwich commercial was so hilarious I will re-post it:

A Logical Analysis of the Manwich Commercial Song:


You don’t have to be a man to love Manwich

Accepted: Men’s palates have not been demonstrated to be different from all other palates (see A Logical Analysis of the argument ‘Real men don’t eat quiche’)

You don’t have to be a witch either – it’s true

Accepted on multiple grounds:

1. The ‘Wich argument: It is not a Man-witch, it is a Manwich, presumably a play on Sandwich, which is based on the Earl of Sandwich who was so dissolute in his gambling ways that he did not want to leave the gambling table to eat at a different table, so he ordered that a meal of meat be placed betwixt two slices of bread so that he could continue to squander his money on a fuller stomach.
2. The Witch argument: Presumably if witches were the sole market for Manwich, the market would be small indeed as most witches are fictional or definitely don’t want to be advertizing the fact lest Sarah Palin’s minister hunt them down.

You just have to love a hot tasty dinner

Disregarding the foodstuff itself, a very inclusive statement: excludes only people who live in hot climates and prefer not to eat hot (temperature-wise) foods, people who don’t eat dinner, and perhaps people with general food aversion (tasty means delicious – who doesn’t like delicious – people with general food aversion). This leaves a large pool of people.

And getting some of that dinner on you.

With this statement, Manwich loses most of the civilized audience. A love of slovenliness is a necessity for love of the Manwich? The analyst is disgusted.

We then continued reading her blog and social commentary. After an hour of blog reading, laughing, and Ryan confessing his love for the girl whom authors Dispatches from Fort Awesome we had laughed ourselves into exhaustion and went to bed. Thank you Manwich, you may taste like crap but you offer one heck of a laugh.

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