Thursday, December 25, 2008

A Christmas of Firsts

Today has been a Christmas of firsts. I am twenty two years old and in twenty two years this is the first that I have not been with my immediate family. While they spent the day in Little Elm (near Dallas) I spent the day in Magnolia (near Houston). While this was my first Christmas away from the only family I have known on Christmas it was also the first Christmas I spent with my new family, In-laws, nieces, and nephews. Here in Magnolia we enjoyed a wonderful Christmas with good food, and great company.

In Little Elm this has been the first Christmas my parents have truly had an empty nest. Both Cassie and I are now married. There were no stockings to stuff, they even decided not to do stockings for each other. This is Cassie's first Christmas with her husband Curtis as part of our family. Maybe the most exciting for them, this is my parent's first Christmas as grandparents. Laura Kate Wiley enjoyed her first Christmas with many gifts (and more to come tomorrow from Uncle Joel and Aunt Ashley).

Being married for nine months this is the first Christmas I have had the opportunity to spend with my new wife. When she asked if I was sad I wasn't spending Christmas with my family I told her that there was no one else I would rather spend my Christmas with than her. This year I gave her a Christmas ornament that is currently hanging on the front of our tree in Tyler. It has an engraving on it that reads, "Our first of many." This Christmas was a Christmas of first and I look forward to the many more that are to come with my ever growing family.



Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Were I to Judge Naughty From Nice




It is probably a good thing that I am not Santa Claus. I think that he must be a pretty lenient guy. There were definitely some kids that I knew growing up who should have been on the naughty list yet they would still return to school bragging about what Santa had brought them. In the spirit of Christmas Eve I decided to make my own list concerning who does and does not get presents. Were I to judge naughty from nice:

Naughty List

  1. Stupid drivers
  2. The people who designed the streets of Tyler Texas
  3. Obsessive holiday shoppers
  4. People who get in their car to leave but sit in the space while someone is waiting on them to park (often this is women checking their makeup)
  5. Holier-than-thou Christians
  6. Christians who "hate" anyone (this is a direct reference to #5)
  7. People in the service industry who hate their job and let you know it
  8. Teenagers who think they know everything (This includes most teenagers and while I still love them, they would receive no presents)
  9. People who text message me who nothing to say
  10. People who don't like dogs
  11. Cats
  12. News Channel Analysts
  13. Ignorant people

Nice List


  1. People who help you move in
  2. People who volunteer (preferably in my youth group)
  3. People who wait until Christmas Eve to do their shopping
  4. People who give you "good deals"
  5. People who work on their own cars
  6. Parents who care about what their kids are doing
  7. Teenagers who can admit when they were wrong
  8. Those who listen to you even when they think you are wrong
  9. Random gift givers
  10. People who agree with me
  11. Cute little kids
  12. Mark Zuckerberg
  13. My wife


Sunday, November 30, 2008

Ms. Dennis

This past week while spending time with my wife's family, my father-in-law and I spent quite a bit of time at Healthsouth of North Houston. Healthsouth is the current resident of my mother-in-law's mother, Wanda Dennis (Ashley's grandmother). Ms. Dennis suffers from Alzheimer's. Her neurological disease in addition to the surgery and stroke she's gone through over the past two months have left her body and mind under an incredible amount of stress. The result of the stress has lead to an increasing loss of her short term memory. While her doctors are hopeful that she may be able to regain some of the memories lost due to her stress level, she remains in the rehabilitation hospital for the time being. The purpose for my father-in-law and I's visits were to receive and apply mobility training in order for Ms. Dennis to leave the hospital for Thanksgiving day. After getting her to and in the car on Thanksgiving my father-in-law went back inside the facility to make sure we had everything we need for her day away. She and I sat in the car waiting.

November 27th 2008 1:55 pm - Thanksgiving Day
Ms. Dennis - Now what is your relation to me?
Me - I am Ashley's husband.

Ms. Dennis - That's right, I went to your wedding.
Me - Thats right.
Ms. Dennis - It was a beautiful wedding. Why am I here?
Me - You had a stroke Ms. Dennis. You are here to get better, but me and Julian are taking you out for the day. It's Thanksgiving.
Ms. Dennis - I had a stroke? Thats right. How long ago was that?
Me - It has been about a month now.
Ms. Dennis - It has? (pause) Where is my husband? (My heart sinks and I begin to feel a knot in the back of my throat.) He's dead, isn't he?



September 18th 2005 1:15 pm - The day after Ashley and I started dating. I am in Lubbock visiting my family for the day.

(My cell phone rings.)
Me - (seeing it is Ashley) Hello?
Ashley - (sounding sad) Hi.
Me - What's wrong?
Ashley - My parents just called. (pause) My Grandfather just died.
Me - Ashley I am so sorry. I will head back to Abilene now.
Ashley - No. Enjoy your time with your family, I will see you tonight.
(I hurry through lunch and leave early anyway.)



March 15th 2008 6:45 pm - Waiting to escort my mom down the isle at mine and Ashley's wedding.

(I turn to see Ms. Dennis sitting in the back of the church foyer with her son Mike. They are waiting for their turn to walk down the isle.)
Ms. Dennis - Joel, we sure are happy to have you as part of the family.
Me - Thank you. (I bend down to hug her).
Ms. Dennis - You are a lucky man. Ashley is a wonderful girl. You will make her happy.
Mike - It's time to go mom.
Ms. Dennis - Welcome to the family.



November 27th 2008 1:56 pm - Thanksgiving Day

Ms. Dennis - He's dead, isn't he?
Me - Yes ma'am
Ms. Dennis - How did he die?
Me - I am not sure.
Ms. Dennis - How long ago was it?
Me - (remembering the phone call) A little over three years.
Ms. Dennis - I miss him.
Me - From what I have been told he was a great man.
Ms. Dennis - Oh. He was. (pause) Now what is your relation to me?
Me - I am Ashley's husband.
Ms. Dennis - Oh that's right. I went to your wedding. It was beautiful.


Ms. Dennis was right, even if she didn't know the full meaning of her words to me on my wedding day. I am very lucky man. Ashley is a wonderful girl, but more than that she also has a wonderful family. A family I am proud to now be a part of. I spent a good portion of my day, on Thanksgiving, sitting and talking with Ms. Dennis, trying to help in what ever way I could. I don't know if she even knows that I helped. I guarantee she doesn't know how much she has helped and encouraged me. In my life I strive, and will continue to strive to be a good man, a man that my wife will be able to say was a great man. A man worthy of my bride and the wonderful family I am now a part of.


Thursday, November 27, 2008

Coffee House Confessions: Thanksgiving Holiday

Today I celebrate my first Thanksgiving without my immediate family. Marrying into a wonderful family my wife and I chose to spend our first Thanksgiving together at her parents home. Tuesday afternoon we loaded up the car and made the three and half hour drive from Tyler to Magnolia. Our first night in town we began looking for a valid form of entertainment for the entire family. Our journey led us to Wal-Mart in search of a fun board game for the whole family. We quickly picked up the game Yahtzee and on our way home stopped by Starbucks.

Before I met the Hawthorne family the only other time I had ever played Yahtzee was years before with my Grandmother and sisters in Mobile AL. The game consists of each player taking turns rolling five dice in search of different number combination. As we sat around the table playing the classic dice game and sipping our lattes I was reminded more and more of home. Some of the greatest times I have had with my family, new and old, have been while sitting at the kitchen table playing a game. Close to midnight with our Starbucks cups empty and in the trash and our Yahtzee cards half full, I was in the lead but to tired to play any more. We went to bed sore from laughter and ready to enjoy our more of our holiday together the next day.

Drink of Choice: Cinnamon Dolce Latte


Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Coffee House Confessions: Falling in Love Over Starbucks

While I would like to say that I do not drink Starbucks, a company that not only represents but leads the way in evil corporate America, I truly have a weakness for grossly overpriced blended coffee drinks. In September of 2005 I began dating my now wife, Ashley. One of her favorite indulgences that I quickly realized was the previously mentioned international-mega-enterprise. Frequently we began going to our local Starbucks, a routine that only furthered my liking blended coffee drinks.

While I may have spent more money than anyone ever should at the coffee chain, I was also making another kind of investment. I made an investment of my time. Some of the greatest moments of my life, to date, happened while sipping a Starbucks drink. The result of that investment was more than a relationship. I fell in love over Starbucks.

It was the time we spent at a table inside, or in the car waiting in the drive through that I fell in love with her. It was the surprise Frappuccino in the afternoon and the smile on her face. It is the giddy look, that she still gets when Starbucks is mentioned. But most of all it was that we enjoyed our drinks together that made me fall in love with her. It was over Starbucks that I really learned who Ashley was. We still go to Starbucks. At times I still think I spend to much money, but I am also getting to know my wife more and more and that, to me, is priceless.

Drink of Choice: Grande
Green Tea Frappuccino® Blended Crème double blended



Monday, October 27, 2008

Coffee House Confessions: The Leaf & Rummy

One of my favorite coffee shops is The Leaf. It is a cigar/coffee shop in Abilene. The atmosphere is one that is laid back, comfortable, and usually a little smoky. While the store's focus of sales revolves around cigars and other tobacco products they also have a very enjoyable coffee selection.

The time I spent at The Leaf was usually spent with brothers from my fraternity, ΚΦΩ. Long afternoons and late nights were spent enjoying brotherhood coffee and cigars at the small business in downtown Abilene. With free wi-fi offered we did everything from watch LOST, to debate theology. No matter what the conversation led to there was most always one constant, Rummy.

The card game has many different ways to play. Most anyone who has played a rummy game has had different rules in playing it. Ours was no different. Accommodating game play from two up to five people there was almost always a game started soon after walking in the door. With trash talk and competitive natures flying the games were always interesting, even if just to watch. I once even lost everything I owned to Jay Patterson (he graciously gave it all back). The memorable thing about Rummy at the leaf wasn't winning or losing. It wasn't about a game, cigars, or coffee. What was memorable was that we lived life together. We grew in our bonds of brotherhood. When we walked out the door we soon forgot the score of the card game but our friendships are something that will never be forgotten.

Drink of Choice: Dr. Pepper


Sunday, October 19, 2008

Its funny because it could happen



The funniest thing about this video is that I know people who this could actually happen to. In the realm that exsists below intellegent thought there is a place reserved men who, in the spirit of competition, slip under the line of existing and into a paradoxical universe where retardation is awarded as the highest honors. It may not be a pretty sight to see. It may discourage many from procrating. But, it sure is funny.


Monday, October 13, 2008

Manwich Has Made My Life Better


It is true, Manwich has made my life better. Not because I have recently sampled the messy meaty meal but because of their new commercial and a random chain of events that I will enclose in this blog.
While sitting and watching TV with my Frat brothers Nick Williamson and Ryan Eberst at their house on Friday night a commercial came on advertising Manwich. It was a commercial that I had not previously seen. It was a short add picturing a happy family eating Manwich Sloppy Joes. While the commercial played a jingel was sung in the background,
You don't have to be a man to love Manwich, you you don't have to be a witch either, its true. You just have to love a fun, tasty dinner, and wearing some of that dinner on you.
After seeing the commercial there was no reaction in the room. It wasn't until halfway through the next commercial that the laughter broke out. We agreeably decided that it was the stupidest commercial we had ever seen. The funniest thing about the commercial was that someone was actually paid money to write the jingle. In hopes that we would see the commercial again we quickly began searching the internet as to see it again and laugh once more. The commercial has not yet dawned the infinite portal of internet videos that is youtube but in our search for a laugh the manwich humor gods released to us another meaty morsel of goodness.


Gasping for air we simultaneously attempted to quote and reload the commercial as to see the shroude of manwich once again. It is still debatable if the commercial was real or ever aired on television but it was certain that manwich had brought us yet another side splitting moment.

Wanting not to give up on seeing the first commercial again we went back to our computers in search. Still not finding it we stumbled into a commentary on the song and the greatest blog that I have read to date. The blog is called Dispatches from Fort Awesome. It is written by a New York law student named Julia. Her post over the manwich commercial was so hilarious I will re-post it:

A Logical Analysis of the Manwich Commercial Song:


You don’t have to be a man to love Manwich

Accepted: Men’s palates have not been demonstrated to be different from all other palates (see A Logical Analysis of the argument ‘Real men don’t eat quiche’)

You don’t have to be a witch either – it’s true

Accepted on multiple grounds:

1. The ‘Wich argument: It is not a Man-witch, it is a Manwich, presumably a play on Sandwich, which is based on the Earl of Sandwich who was so dissolute in his gambling ways that he did not want to leave the gambling table to eat at a different table, so he ordered that a meal of meat be placed betwixt two slices of bread so that he could continue to squander his money on a fuller stomach.
2. The Witch argument: Presumably if witches were the sole market for Manwich, the market would be small indeed as most witches are fictional or definitely don’t want to be advertizing the fact lest Sarah Palin’s minister hunt them down.

You just have to love a hot tasty dinner

Disregarding the foodstuff itself, a very inclusive statement: excludes only people who live in hot climates and prefer not to eat hot (temperature-wise) foods, people who don’t eat dinner, and perhaps people with general food aversion (tasty means delicious – who doesn’t like delicious – people with general food aversion). This leaves a large pool of people.

And getting some of that dinner on you.

With this statement, Manwich loses most of the civilized audience. A love of slovenliness is a necessity for love of the Manwich? The analyst is disgusted.


We then continued reading her blog and social commentary. After an hour of blog reading, laughing, and Ryan confessing his love for the girl whom authors Dispatches from Fort Awesome we had laughed ourselves into exhaustion and went to bed. Thank you Manwich, you may taste like crap but you offer one heck of a laugh.


Thursday, July 17, 2008

The Kirby


It had been a long day. It was a Sunday and I had spent my entire day at the church. Between preaching twice, teaching Sunday School, and dealing with difficult church members I was ready to go home, pop in a movie, sit on the couch, and just relax. The doorbell rang. A young African-American woman stood at my door with a big smile. "Have you received your free gift yet," her question intrigued me. I love gifts, giving and receiving them, Dr. Gary Chapman would tell you it is one of my love languages. "No," I cautiously replied. "Well, I am from the Kirby company..." As she trailed off about offering me a free gift from the Kirby Company I had a horrific flashback to my childhood, sitting on a couch in Lawrenceville Georgia for two hours, while my mother had the Kirby salesman vacuum our entire house. "...so it is just a real quick presentation it wont take long at all. I will go and get George." As she retreated in the direction of the neighborhood she had come from the thought occurred to me, "OH NO!"
If you don't know about Kirby vacuums let me enlighten you. The only way to purchase a new Kirby model is to do so from a sales person who comes to your home. They present the product and let is "speak for itself." They have sold vacuums the same way since 1914 when Jim Kirby designed the Ezee Vacuum Cleaner. The Avon of vacuum cleaners Kirby has become an icon representing long boring presentations of products you most likely can't afford, and certainly don't want.

As George entered my home, while my dinner got cold and my movie was paused. I convinced myself that I would be polite for ten minutes before I ask the young man to politely leave, this was at 8:30pm. If you have never dealt with the Kirby Company before let me warn you that they train their employees in the art of refusing to leave. For the nest two hours George, an African-American young man vacuumed my house. And when I say vacuumed my house I mean any possible surface you can think of because the Kirby Sentria can do it all.

My carpet was vacuumed, and shampooed. My kitchen floor was vacuumed. My couches were vacuumed. My mattress was vacuumed. My Television was vacuumed. My ceiling fan was vacuumed. My runner boards were vacuumed. My dry wall was vacuumed. The man even wanted to vacuum my cat (THAT IS NOT A JOKE). Those were just the attachments that he brought. There were additional optional attachments that act as a spray painter, sander, and dermal. They even have a back massage attachment, this is for all for a vacuum cleaner.

Two hours after the young my door bell the "closer" sat on my couch. With his handy chart he showed me the price of such a wonderful tool, $2150.00. This could easily be broken down into affordable payments over the next several months. As I kindly conveyed that they had about a snowflake's chance in hell of selling me a vacuum cleaner, I made a promise to myself, the next time the door bell rings IGNORE IT!!


Tuesday, July 8, 2008

XYG (Examin Your Generation): Insight into the X Y Generations. Pt. 1

This is Who We Are

Recently I saw a video by a girl named Ladonna Witmer. In 1998 Ladonna recorded a video entitled Who I Am that explained generation X at a church conference for Baby Boomers. Though Ladonna spoke of her generation (Gen. X) and she admittedly is not the same person she was, the things she said in her 8 minutes presentation sum up the American and Christian condition for the twenty and thirty-something generations of today, generations X and Y.

The things that she stated were powerful, shocking, and hit close to home. She was a girl who enjoys black fingernails and strange clothes but had volumes of insight. She spoke of generations searching for truth but instead of finding truth they are finding hypocrisies from their parent's generation. In her presentation she states, "You speak of a Christianity that unifies and builds each other up but all we have seen is a church that divides." She makes some harsh statements about church and about church members who do not seem to care. In the end she spoke of seeking advice from our parent's generation because we know that they had been through much of what we are going through, but in seeking advice she stated that it was hard to find anyone to listen. She spoke of a generation seeking truth but being disgusted by the church's hypocritical answers for what truth was. She introduced two generations of cynics looking for answers to a room looking for who our generations are.

I saw this video with a room full of baby boomers. Myself and a handful of others were the only ones who fit into the generations in question. It was interesting to see the difference in how the age groups interpreted the video. While The baby boomers made the assumption that she was self centered and didn't really seem to care. Those in my group insisted on quite the opposite. She is searching for truth and in her search she is finding the same thing that many of us are, a two faced Christianity focused only on the appearance of excellence. When questioned what background we thought she had most baby boomers replied that she was un-churched. Our group hit the nail on the head when we suggested she grew up in a conservative church (It was a fundamental Baptist). The reason why so many churches are having a hard time reaching these generations today is because they are trying to reach us by pushing church at us and it is the very thing that is driving so many away. X and Y do not want excellence in their churches, Christianity, or lives anymore. Much more important than excellence is truth, a genuine, authentic truth.

I wouldn't consider myself so engrossed in our generational struggles as Ladonna and many others are, but as I watched her video I could most assuredly associate with her. We have grown up questioning, my father can attest for me, but in our searching so often we are given inadequate answers, or no answers at all. We question everything. Taking someone's word for truth went out the window when the concept of marriage lasting a lifetime did. It isn't that the words of others are incorrect, it is that they are open and subject to criticism. We are not a speak-when-spoken-to generation. We are not idle thinkers. We are a speak-a-voice-of-expression generation, and out-loud thinkers. In search for answers we don't find what we are looking for and assume the possibility that there is not truth. This postmodern view is simply a result of searching and coming up empty handed.

I don't know if we are right in thinking as we do, in fact many times I think that we are wrong, but this is who we are.



Wednesday, May 28, 2008

A Clean Case of Lifevesting

It was the Wednesday afternoon before my Grandparent's 50th wedding anniversary when I got the phone call from my mother. She was calling to make sure that I was packing my suit to take to Alabama for the celebration. Needing to bring a suit, being new news to me, came at an very inconvenient time. I knew that the one suit I owned was dirty and since I was getting ready to go to work I would not have time to drop it off by the dry cleaners before my scheduled clock-in time. I went to work, came home late and went to bed. The next morning (Thursday) I woke up and went to class. I arrived back in my dorm room at around 11:00. Knowing that I was leaving to go to Alabama Friday morning I began calling dry cleaners. For forty-five minutes I called business asking them if they could clean my suit and have it back to me today before 5:00. No Luck. At the end of my rope I reached the last number under the dry cleaner's section in the phone book, Tyler's Cleaners.

The woman who answered the phone was very nice and seemed to be a person in some position of power (latter I would find out that she was the owner of the business, Mrs. Tyler). I told her my situation and asked if there was any way she could get my suit cleaned and back to me by 5:00. Without hesitation she said,
Well even though it's a little late in the day if you can get it by here by 12:30 we can get it cleaned for you.
I hopped in my car and drove across town to the location of the cleaners. When I arrived I quickly found out that the same woman on the phone was behind the counter. I told her that I was the man on the phone, she smiled, and took my suit. She then turned and asked for my phone number, I gave it to her she wrote it on a piece of paper and pinned it to the suit. Along with it a note that read,
Rush Order! Call When Ready!
She informed me that it would probably be close to 5:00 before it was ready. I reassured her that 5:00 was great as long as it was clean, and then left. At a quarter to three my cell phone rang, it was the same woman telling me that my suit was ready and that she personally had just pulled it off of the rack. When I arrived at the cleaners to pick up the suit she again greeted me with a smile and gave me the suit, I paid her for the services and asked for a few business cards. I told her I didn't know of many college students who used dry cleaners but if anyone ever asked me I would send them to her way. She handed me the business cards, thanked me, and wished my grandparents a happy 50th.

Mrs. Tyler did what she had to more often than she probably wanted to for less money than she deserved all because she had a larger view in mind. Mrs. Tyler was a lifevestor but even more than that she ran her business with the same principles. I don't know how much business I gave Tyler cleaners, but I handed out all of the business cards, and every time I need something dry cleaned I will drive past four other dry cleaners on my way to Tyler Cleaners.

For more lifevesting stories check out www.lifevesting.com.


Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Medical Show Heroes

I have always watched TV shows that revolve or have themes that revolve around medicine, even those I have just watched in reruns. M*A*S*H, Doogie Howser, Rescue 911,Third Watch, along with other shows, have entertained me through many late nights and boring afternoons. The three crown jewels in my book of medical TV shows are, ER, Scrubs, and House M.D. In each of these shows there are characters who stand out. It is these characters that put each in the top three.
Dr. Robert Romano. Many fans of the widely popular ER hated Romano for his rude comments, rough social skills, and canny ability to piss people off. The character was killed off the show midway through the tenth season. Dr. Romano was the type of man who got things done. As Chief of Staff Romano would be described as being insensitive, but if there was one thing that he did care about was saving lives. Dr. Romano, usually a jerk, usually right, and always entertaining.

The next doc to grace my top three is Dr. Perry Cox on another NBC medical show, Scrubs. Though scrubs is the comedy that jump started Zach Braff's career the comedy stylings of John C. McGinley help to make the show. Dr. Cox appears to be a self centered arrogant doctor who doesn't want the role of mentor that everyone else places on him. The truth is Cox is self centered, but deep inside he cares more about his patients and coworkers than anyone else at Sacred Heart. His hilarious drawn out rants, insults, and raves make the character the hero of the show.
I guess the producers at FOX finally picked up on idea of the jerk doctor who doesn't like people and is always sure that they are right. In 2004 House M.D. premiered. Staring the popular British actor Hugh Laurie as a Gregory House, the brilliantly dysfunctional Head of Diagnostic Medicine at Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. Living under the philosophy that everyone he meets is lying to him, House, spends as little time as possible with patients and uses questionable techniques to save lives. The pill-popping, limping self loathing doctor doesn't care as much about people as he does with doing what is right. The character offers a paradox with his questionable morals concerning his personal life but over exerts himself to save patients he claims he doesn't like. The intricate character development, in my opinion, is the reason the show is multiple award winning drama.

I don't know if it is the fact that there are few people in the world that act in the manner of Romano, Cox, and House, or the fact that at times we all act like them, but they are the type of characters that make me sure that cynicism makes humanity more entertaining.


Honorable Mention:


Hawkeye Pierce


Thursday, May 15, 2008

The 40 Acres

I graduated Saturday. I became one of the many names to be placed on the alumni wall at Hardin-Simmons University, the 40 Acres. After four years I have earned my Bachelor of Arts in Ministry. The things I learned in order to earn my degree H-SU don't come close to rivaling the life experience I gained in the past four years. I have met people who have changed my life for the better, some of them friends I will keep close the remainder of my life. College went by Fast. I remember my first night on campus my roommate, Geoffrey, and I locked ourselves out of the dorm and stood outside for close to an hour before we found someone to let us in.

My very first class, Computer Basics, I sat across from a man named Arron Nunn. Aaron was on 25 and starting H-SU as a freshman for the second time in his life. The first time he had gone to college for all of the wrong reasons and as a result his GPA was so poor that he ended up dropping out and joining the military. While in the military (or some time shortly after) Aaron's life was turned around. He began living his life for the Lord.

My very first class was the only class I had with Aaron at H-SU, however I vaguely kept up with Aaron when I would run into him on campus. Saturday morning the first person I saw when I entered the room where the graduating students were instructed to congregate, the first face I saw was Aaron's. We briefly discussed our time at school, our wives, and our plans for the future. The thing that struck me the most about our conversation is realizing how much we had both changed while at the 40 Acres. The past four years have been some of the best of my life.

here are the links to my favorite H-SU posts I have written over the past four hears:





Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Change

Over the past month I have experienced significant change. And over the next month I will go through even more change. Exactly one month ago I married the love of my life and my life suddenly changed. In less than one month my life will experience even more change and I will graduate from college. Change looks different throughout life, but never before can I think of change ever effecting me so much than now.

For the past four years my priority for living in Abilene was (at least supose to be) first of all school, followed second by work, and third social life including dating. As soon as I said "I do" (actually I said "It is") my priorities changed. My first priority became my family, second became work to provide for my family, and third now is school. Since I am a month away from graduating I am not to concerned about but if i had to make the choice, school would no longer be first.

I have also begun to realize that there has been a change in my time. I no longer am simply using "my" time to do things but am now using "our" time. My time is no longer my own. What I do with my time will effect my wife and the things that she does. I have become more conscience of what I do and how long it takes me to do that.

The way I live from day to day has greatly changed. I seem to clean much more now than I did before. I eat out less, go to bed earlier, and wake earlier. With all this change happening I have come to the understanding that not all change is bad. It seems that many times in life we reflect on how things were. Change often times is uncomfortable, it is awkward, and most of the time it is unwelcome. But it is important to realize that without change there would be no, reformation, no America light bulb, no cars, no computers, no cell phones. Change is a necessity of life. There comes a time when we have to realize that nothing is permanent, life changes, and with it so do we. There is a way to embrace change without forgetting the fondness of the past.


For more insights on change check out Lifevesting.com


Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Book Review: Three Treatises


Martin Luther's, Three Treatises

AUTHOR BACKGROUND

In the study of Christian history one can not get far without hearing of Martin Luther. Most famous for his ninety-five thesis that he nailed to the door of a Wittenberg church door, he is considered the father of the protestant reformation. Born, November 10, 1483, Luther devoted his life to the monastic lifestyle of knowledge and faith, after having quit law school. His own studies of scripture led him to theological views that did not align with the Roman Catholic church or the Papacy. On October 31, 1517 when Luther nailed his theological views to the front door of a church he began the steps that lead to the protestant reformation and upheaval from the Roman Catholic Church. Three years after the nailing of his ninety-five Luther released three works: An Open Letter to the Christian Nobility of the German Nation, The Babylonian Captivity of the Church, and The Freedom of a Christian. Together these works were compiled to form his Three Treatises.

SUMMARY OF CONTENT

In critiquing such a work as Three Treatises one must look at each of the three portions separately in order to make an accurate critique of the whole. The first of the three sections, An Open Letter to the Christian Nobility of the German Nation, is addressed to German nobility in hopes that they will help enact the reform that the Roman Catholic Church so blatantly opposed with their excommunication of Martin

Luther. While the letter can be broken down into three sections, (The Three Walls of the Romanists, Abuses to be Discussed in Councils, and Proposal to Reform) the third of which has three subsections of it’s own, the underlining message that comes from this portion of the book is the doctrine of the priesthood of the believer.

In The Babylonian Captivity of the Church, Luther attacks the sacramental system. In his argument he begins by immediately dismissing all but three sacraments, the Eucharist, Baptism, and Penance. In the end he regarded penance as positive in the light of Matthew 16:19 ("I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven; and whatever you bind on earth shall have been bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall have been loosed in heaven.") although the doctrine had been corrupted by the Roman Catholic Church. Even though the Matthew 16:19 view of penance was positive Luther did not view it as sacramental status. The only remaining two sacraments were the Eucharist and Baptism, each with it’s own set of corruptions from the Papacy and the Church. Luther focuses a great portion of his argument refuting three portions of the Eucharist: the laity can not receive the cup, the transubstantiation of the elements, and the sacrifice of Mass.

The third and final portion of the book is The Freedom of the Christian Life. This final letter is much shorter than the other two letters. The content of it contains the whole of the Christian life in a brief summarized form. In it he deals with the contradicting natures of man.

CRITICAL ANALYSIS

In the documents present in the book one can not say that Luther’s arguments were unsupported, shallow, or weak. On most any given page one turns to one can find multiple scripture references and explanations of those references. In example (randomly selected among hundreds) the section To The Christian Nobility of the German Nation under the topic of attacking the first wall of the Romanist structure Luther says, “ …we are all consecrated priests through baptism, as St. Peter says in 1 Peter 2.” Countless more times throughout the book not only does he reference scripture but directly quotes it as well.

Not only is the book well saturated with scriptural references, but also it is structurally formed in such a way to break things down into simple form for the reader. In a similar style of his theological descendant, C. S. Lewis, Luther forms a simple structural breakdown that allows the reader to fully understand the arguments presented in his writings. This is best seen in the first letter where he breaks the it into three sections: The Three Walls of the Romanists, Abuses to be Discussed in Councils, and Proposal to Reform. Luther also takes it a step further and breaks it down into subcategories and numbered lists of explanations and repudiations. The same structure can be seen as well in the second letter when he breaks down the three sacraments and again breaks them each into smaller sections to discuss and reform the positions.

It is difficult when critiquing a document such as this to develop any negative critique, when the student writing the critique comes from a devout protestant background. Documents such as the three represented in the work by Luther have become foundations for much of the doctrine that is held true in protestant institutions. In order to critique such material one must lay one’s presuppositions aside and if necessary look through the perspective of someone who holds to the opposite views. In the case that is presented in this critique the opposite view point would be that of the Papacy and the Roman Catholic Church. Keeping such perspective in mind while analyzing the essays it becomes evident that Luther commits the logical fallacy of, “attacking the person.” The fallacy that is such that the author makes it a point to attack the person in order to argue or strengthen their own argument. This is evident in Luther’s writings in To the Christian Nobility of the German Nation. In his attack on the second wall that is presented by the Roman Catholic Church he attacks the Pope when he says, “But Christ's words to Peter, ‘I have prayed for you that your faith fail not’ [Luke 22:32], cannot be applied to the pope, since the majority of the popes have been without faith.” He continues to commit the fallacy when he says, “The Romanists want to be the only masters of Holy Scripture, although they never learn a thing from the Bible all their life long.” He continues through all three documents to use harsh words and name calling to attack his opponent, even suggesting that the Pope is an Anti-Christ. While these attacks seem small in the entirety of Luther’s arguments they are present and do take a role in weakening his argument, even if it is just a bit.

The literary style is hard to judge seeing as the original letters were written in German. Each section was translated and revised by separate men. An Open Letter to the Christian Nobility was translated by Charles M. Jacobs. The Babylonian Captivity of the Church was translated by A. T. W. Steinhauser and revised by Frederick C. Ahrens. The Freedom of a Christian was translated by W. A. Lambert and revised by Harold J. Grimm. Since the one critiquing the book has no knowledge of German, therefore not possessing the capability to compare the translations and revisions to the original text the critical analysis of the writing style is inconclusive.

The Three Treatises is a book that provides an ample supply of doctrine. Much of that doctrine has influence and laid the foundation for Protestantism. The book itself is recommended to any and all people in the protestant faith in order to better understand parts of the faith’s foundation and doctrinal beliefs.




Friday, March 7, 2008

Tetris

This is an actual screen shot taken from a game of Tetris that I just played. It was the greatest game of Tetris I have ever played and quite possibly the greatest game of Tetris that has ever been played in the history of the game. The Russians don't hold a flame to my mad Tetris skills. If you notice I am on level 19 with 182 lines and with an amazing 140,148 score. If you think you can beat me take a screen shot of your score and post it in my comments. The site is Free Tetris.


Monday, March 3, 2008

12 Days to Wedding


In 12 days I will be a married man. Ever since I proposed to Ashley I have been getting advice, "Joel says this." "Joel don't say that" "Joel you should help with the wedding" "Joel you should avoid helping with the wedding." I am appreciative that Ashley has just wanted me to be me. If that means I help or don't she wants me to be true to who I am. In our culture we are told that we have to work hard to be the best person we can be...whatever happen to being made in the image of God. Don't get me wrong...I am not naive enough to think that when I get married everything will be easy and stay the same, but I also don't want to work so hard to become someone who isn't me. Isn't it logical that doing such a thing would only make the transition of lifestyles more difficult. So I am in love, getting married, and trying hard to stay true to who I am while discovering who we will be.


Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Searching for Bobby Fischer?

The search is over. Bobby Fischer has been found. He currently resides in the Laugardaelir Church Cemetery in Hafnarfjordur, Iceland. Possibly the best chess player to ever live, Fischer led an interesting life.

In the summer of 1972 Fischer became an American Cold War hero when he defeated Boris Spassky in the World Chess Championship 121/2 games to 81/2. Fischer was the first and only American to ever hold the title. The news coverage of Fischer's victory transformed the game of chess overnight into a sensation that would empty store shelves of chess sets around the country. After attempting the lifestyle a celebrity he retreated instead to one of seclusion eventually having his championship title stripped from him when he refused to defend it in 1975.

Fischer was born March 9th 1943. The son of Regina Wendler a
naturalized American citizen of Polish Jewish descent who was studying to be a nurse as well as pursuing a career as a school teacher. His father (allegedly) was Hans-Gerdhart a German biophysicist. The two met in Moscow each while studying in their own field and we quickly married. By the age of two Fischer's parents were divorced. He remained with his mother. Growing up the majority of his childhood on the streets of Brooklyn, Fischer learned to play chess with a set that his sister bought him at a candy shop on the bottom floor of their apartment complex. Even as a young teenager Fischer attracted attention of the mdia. Sports columnist Dick Schaap even took interest in the boy. At one time Fischer said that Schaap acted as a "father figure" to him. Fishcer would later use different words to describe Schaap. Not all was well for the future Grand Master. At the age of sixteen Fischer dropped out of school convinced that school had nothing more to teach him. Shortly after he dropped out his mother moved out of the apartment they shared. Many believed that Fischer resented his mother due to her ties to communism and admiration of the Soviet Union. This resentment would player and person Fischer would grow to be.


Bobby Fischer, once an American Hero turned into a bitter, angry, resentful person. Quite possibly the greatest chess player the world has ever seen died a disgrace. We can all learn from the life of Bobby Fischer. Here was a man breaming with potential who let his talents, waste away and the pain of his past dictate the bitterness of his life. I seem to remember another story about wasted talents:
There was a business man who had three workers. Before leaving on a trip he called them all into his office. To one man he gave five talents. To the second man he gave two talents. To the third man he gave one talent. He then left on his trip. Both the man with the five talents and the man with the two talents invested them and doubled their investments but the man with the one talent went put it away, locking it in his desk drawer. When the businessman returned he asked each man about their talents. The first two men showed him their profits. The business man was so please with his workers that he said, "You were both faithful with the little I gave you, because of that you will both get a raise and a promotion." He then asked the man with the one talent of his progress. The man reproduced his talent from his desk. The man said, "I was afraid that I would lose it so I just put it away and didn't think about it." The business man responded by saying, "You wicked lazy man even if you had put the talent in the bank you would have gained interest." He then took away the talent and gave it to the man with ten. The business man decided that for every one of his workers that had risked and profited more would be give but for those who wasted what they had been given, everything would be taken away and the man fired. (Paraphrase of Matthew 25:14-30).
Bobby Fischer was like the man with the one talent. Fischer had the title of World Champion and because he hid away with his talent his title was taken away from him. He held onto his bitterness and could not learn to forgive. When instructing us how to pray Jesus says that we should forgive others because we ourselves have been forgiven. These are the two principles in life that Bobby Fischer failed to understand and as a result he is not remembered as the greatest chess player to ever live but instead a sad, angry, waste of talent. Don't be like Bobby Fischer.


Thursday, February 14, 2008

Divorce Game

Tuesday morning I woke up early at my future in-law's house, kissed my wonderful fiancee goodbye, and began my drive back to Abilene. One thing I always have enjoyed while driving in the morning are radio morning shows. Most days, I am not in my car long enough to hear them, but Tuesday driving away from Magnolia I found the time. When I do get the chance, I listen to my favorite show, Kidd Kraddick in the Morning. After going through the dial several times it seemed that I was not in an area that would pick up Kidd, Big Al Mack, Kelly Raspberry, and their crazy antics. Instead I settled for the Roula and Ryan Show on 104.1 KRBE, a Houston favorite.

After listening to the show for an hour the DJs began a new segment called "Divorce Game." The idea behind the game comes from the 2000 census claiming that in 3.2 million married relationships the husbands and wives live in different locations, due to jobs, school, children, or separation. The DJs interested in this information developed the theory that there are people living in America who are married and no longer love their spouse but cannot afford to pay for a divorce. They are not angry with each other they are simply no longer in love. In reaction to their theory the "game" was developed. Roula and Ryan were looking for couples who fit in the category and on Thursday morning (Valentines Day) they would put these couples on the radio and choose three and pay for each couple's divorce.


After hearing the segment I was shocked. Marriage in our culture has become a phase that simply passes, instead of a lifetime commitment. When our culture becomes more enamored with the relationships of celebrities, than their own relationships, there should be a cultural red flag waving in our faces. And when we read magazines like, US, Star, and OK not to see if someone gets divorced but to see when, we have pigeonholed the relationships of our society. We are forcing our culture into a divorce mentality. An institution that was once thought of as the greatest commitment one could make, recognized by both the church and the government as and iron clad contract, has slowly slipped loose from its binds and with it has brought down the meaning and purpose of commitment itself.

**Before I continue I would like to make the statement that in no way do I condone anyone remaining in a continually abusive relationship. If a spouse is abusive physically, verbally, emotionally, or in any other way and is not repentant and has no desire to be repentant they have already quit and given up on their relationship. For the non-abusive spouse to remain in the relationship is unhealthy and borderline sinful.**

In 30 days I will get married. When I informed my father that I had met the woman of my dreams and that I wanted to marry her, before he would give me his blessing he gave me assignment, "Joel, I want you to find out why people get divorced." My study on the subject produced a list of eight reasons people claim as the reason that they file for divorce:
  1. Money - The Bible says that the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil.
  2. Alcohol - There is a popular sign that reads: Alcohol Destroys Internally, Externally, and Eternally.
  3. Sexual problems - Improper attitudes about sex, and not physical causes, bring couples to the breaking point.
  4. Immaturity - Married life is for adults, not for children.
  5. Jealousy - One who demands exclusive devotion, and is intolerant of rivalry usually feels inadequate.
  6. "Happily ever after" myth - It's based on the artificial and often unrealistic picture of love and life as depicted by many motion picture films.
  7. In-Laws - "Therefore, shall a man leave his father and his mother and shall cleave unto his wife. And they shall be one flesh."
  8. Irresponsibility - When a young man is irresponsible and unwilling to work before marriage, the chances are extremely good that he'll continue the same pattern of behavior after marriage.
It took me a while to realize it but this list of eight reasons aren't reasons at all, they might be influences to why people divorce but they are not reasons. In my observation of church, culture, and media in light of divorce I believe that there is one reason why people divorce, they give up. Divorce seems to be the easy way out. Unless someone is in an abusive relationship (as mention before) divorce is not a solution. One of the things Ashley and I decided is that we would take the last full measure to save our marriage if something was going wrong. If that means counseling then we will go to counseling. If it means moving, changing jobs, or other self sacrificing methods we will put our marriage first. As a society we need to view our marriages as serious commitments as lifestyle changes not phases or a games.


Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Burned


The Leaf is a the favorite smoke shop of Abilene locals. It is an old-fashion smoke and coffee shop located downtown specializing in cigars and pipes. Frequently visited by college students and cigar aficionados it is a quiet place to grab a cup of coffee or a good cigar. The owner of The Leaf is a man named Bill. Today, while working on my disciple now material across the street at Monk's (a local coffee shop), fire trucks began pulling up to The Leaf, sirens blazing. Rushing outside to see what the commotion was. I caught up with Bill and inquired into what had happened. He said to me, "There is smoke coming out of the walk-in humidor and not the kind that we want to smell in there." The fire department inspected the situation and determined that the blower motor in the humidor had burned up. The blower was shut off, the fire trucks left, and The Leaf re-opened. But the incident made me think about Bill.

Bill is a very intriguing man and today isn't the first time that his work has burned him. Bill has a Bachelor of Science degree in Ministry as well as his Master of Divinity degree. Bill is a former pastor but now he owns a smoke shop. He had a bad experience at a church that he pastored and since has left the full-time ministry. Talk to him long enough and you will find out that Bill is bitter. He once saw me wearing a Logdson Seminary t-shirt and told me that seminary is where young men go to get their minds corrupted. Bill went through an experience that many pastors go through, he was burned by a church.

As someone who is aspiring to go into the pastorate having a bad experience at a church is something that is always at the back of my mind. I earnestly pray that God brings me to people who will love me. Currently, I love my job. I love the church that I work for. I love the people in that church. I don't want to be like Bill. I want to love the ministry. For those of you who are or are going to be ministers let me encourage you to burn proof your ministry and that starts with loving people. For those who are church attenders, fight for your pastors not against them. To many people who have surrendered to the call to ministry are surrendering their ministries. I feel bad for Bill but am inspired because of him, inspired to work hard for a lasting ministry, inspired to encourage others in their ministries, and inspired to help make myself and others burn proof.


Saturday, February 2, 2008

Thank You!!

I am entering an incredible time in my life. Today is my (and by "my" I mean Ashley's) first wedding shower (first of three). Tomorrow we will load up the Yukon with shower gifts and presents and taken them to the house that will be our first home. Soon after arriving the gifts will be inventoried and then it begins...the "thank you" notes. Leslie Harold columnist for The Morning News wrote a column on the proper etiquette for writing a thank you note. In it she includes a six point guide to writing a thank you note, giving proper examples of each (**Disclaimer: example given is actual example for thank you note**).
  1. Greet the giver: Dear Aunt Sally,
  2. Express your gratitude: Thank you for the slippers.
  3. Discuss use: It gets very chilly here in the winter, so they will get a lot of use when winter comes.
  4. Mention the pass, allude to the future: It was great to see you at the birthday party, and I hope to see you at Dad's retirement in February.
  5. Grace: Thanks again for the gift.
  6. Regards: Love Leslie
I don't know about any of you but I always feel awkward when I get a thank you note and don't know what to do with it, so I have devised the six stages of receiving a thank you note:

  1. Excite over receiving personal mail: "Wow!! mail that is not a bill or credit card application"
  2. Realizing that the letter is a thank you note: "Oh! This must be a thank you note for the slippers I gave Leslie...re-gifting is so convenient."
  3. Reading the thank you note: "Dear Aunt Sally...blah blah blah...thanks for the slippers...yadda yadda yadda...cold in winter...yeah yeah...Dad's retirement...Love Leslie!"
  4. Throw card on pile of papers on corner of desk: "On the pile it goes."
  5. Feel awkward about card as if it would be wrong to throw it way: "Maybe I will frame it or put it on display for when she comes to visit."
  6. Months/Years later throw card away: "I really shouldn't let my desk get this junky."

So I say that we scrap the whole thing. Lets just stop, stop writing thank you notes. No one likes writing them so I say we get rid of them. I honestly urge you all to think seriously about the enjoyment factor of writing thank you notes. So the question I have is, "Why?" For any of you out there who have the proper answer of, "To show your gratitude," let me offer you this little tid-bit of knowledge, the people who are the recipients of your thank you notes...they don't want to write thank you notes either. So we are stuck in a paradox of, hating writing thank you notes to people who hate to write thank you notes. Don't get me wrong I think it is very important to show authentic sincere gratitude but I think that we should pick a new way of doing it. Perhaps a secret handshake, or a mention in a prayer, or even better than that...help abolish thank you note writing so they will never have to write one again.


Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Pecans

Yesterday after work I needed to go to the grocery store to pick up a few items in the continual uphill battle to keep my kitchen stocked. The store, being just a few blocks from where I live, offered a short drive, mostly through residential neighborhoods. As I turned onto my street my eyes quickly scanned in the direction of my house. When my eyes locked in on the location I was shocked to see a man bent over in my yard shoveling pecans into his bucket at rapid pace. I was so shocked that I drove right by my house. Turning around in a near by drive-way I began going through exactly what I would say to the pecan snatcher when I spoke to him. "Hey! What do you think your doing!" or maybe "Those aren't your pecans! Dump them out!" But instead of those a different thought came to heart and mind.

I drove into the drive-way of my house and as I passed the man looked up with terror in his eyes, and I could see that he was thinking about running. I stepped out of my car and he came towards me looking very frightened and apologetic. He was an elderly Hispanic man who looked as if he had spent a few to many years doing manual labor. Looking at me with his head bowed low he said, "I sorry, I sorry." I smiled. Then after reassuring him that I wasn't angry showed him that some of the pecans in the yard had worms in them and to avoid them because they were no good. I then retrieved my pecan picker tool that would allow a person to pick up the pecans without bending over, showed him how it worked, and handed him the tool. He smiled, "Gracious!"

Retrieving my groceries from the car I walked inside and set them down. Feeling unsatisfied with the level of aid I had given the man I decided to cook him a cheese burger on my George Foreman. Before putting up my groceries I quickly pulled a patty out of the fridge threw a little seasoning on it and placed on the lean mean fat reducing grilling machine. A few minutes latter I walked outside handed the man the hot sandwich, and a bottled drink. He smiled, half in enthusiasm, half in shock as he took the food and drink from my hands.

It is times like these in life when I feel the effectiveness of my call. Jesus himself said the greatest commandment is to, "Love the Lord your God with our your heart, soul, and mind...and the second is like it, Love your neighbor as yourself." (Matthew 22:37-39) Love God and love people. I think Jesus was on to something.



 
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